Do you feel like you never have enough time to do what you want to do?
Does it seem like work is the only thing that you are able to focus on?
Are you frustrated that your life revolves around everyone else’s needs?
Is your brain throwing tantrums that scream “What about what I want?”
It’s time to take control and start doing things that you want to do.
Imagine this. You move into your very first house. You have the basic living needs that you bring with you. Along the way, you buy furniture, decorations, clothes, toys, and all sorts of stuff that take up space. Over time, you notice that closets are overflowing and your cabinets will barely shut. You can’t seem to keep things in order.
You are overwhelmed with ALL THE STUFF!
How did this happen?
After a purging spree that takes WAY too long, you are left with the items that are most important to you, some items that you feel obligated to hang on to, and of course your basic needs.
Ahhh, that feels better.
This is exactly what happens to your life! Little by little, you have added things to your schedule. Work, kids, sports, work, family, friends, work (again)….
It feels like you can never come up for air – much less take a second for yourself and think.
If this is how you feel, this is your sign that it’s time to purge.
Well, maybe not all at once. You aren’t trying to flip the house upside down, but you definitely need to take inventory to see what’s flowing out of the closets and understand why the drawers won’t shut.
I am going to help you get started so you can get some relief and decide what stays in your life, what needs to go, and what you want to add. Get your pen and paper out and follow the steps below.
MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE THINGS THAT CURRENTLY TAKE UP YOUR TIME
This would include work, meetings, committees, networking, childcare, showering, eating, sleeping, laundry, cleaning – any commitments that you are obligated to do and all the things that you feel like you need to do. Make sure to get everything out and on paper. Pretend you are cleaning out your closet and you aren’t leaving one dust bunny behind.
MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE THINGS THAT YOU WANT TO DO
Read, exercise, travel, self-care – anything that you want to do but you never make time for. If you could pick the most amazing wardrobe to go back in your closet, what would it be? Allow yourself to dream here. Even if some of your wants aren’t possible yet, these are goals to work for in the future. If there are things that you are already doing for yourself, add those here too. You want to acknowledge the good things that you already set aside time for.
Look at each list. Pick ONE thing from your schedule to take away and ONE thing from your want list to add. Don’t let yourself get overwhelmed. Pick the smallest of things. That’s it. Just one thing. I know – there is so much more that you want to do. Your brain wants to get rid of more and do more fun things! Trust me on this. Starting small is key. When you try to do too much as once, it makes it difficult to maintain. Especially when you have been practicing this current life for so long. Too much at once sets you up for failure and causes overwhelm in the other direction.
PUT IT ON YOUR CALENDAR AND HONOR IT
This is key. Whatever the one thing is that you have picked from your want list, put it on your calendar. You are the one that picked it and you are the one that has to make it happen. Practice choosing to do this for one month before removing or adding anything else. This will not only create a habit. It builds confidence and the ability to trust yourself that you will have your own back.
DO IT AGAIN
Set a date on your calendar to review both lists again. Just like cleaning your closets and drawers, this isn’t one and done. You have to take the time to clean and restructure. You have to maintain what you started.
If you are interested in taking this work a step further, my SET program is exactly what you need. Schedule a time for a consult call to learn more.